It’s never easy to put your life back on track when it goes off. People who have had to do such a thing can testify to it. That, by its challenging nature, some people don’t do the work but leave their lives to go down the drain.
If you have gone through this experience, you know it. It takes courage and a hefty dose of persistence to bring your life back on its proper track.
With that said, here are the ten tools I used to bring back my life on track when it fell off;
From traditional knowledge, anger is a bad thing. It’s considered a negative behavior. And it’s perfectly valid. But, as we know, anger is a helpful tool, too. Naturally, if you don’t get angry about something, especially if they aren’t in their correct places, you aren’t normal, and I guess you need the psychiatry. Look back at the course of history, every individual who has affected change did it through anger — not being satisfied with affairs. It’s this type of anger I’m talking about.
The same happened to me when I needed to change my life for the better. I became angry with things. I didn’t understand why with all the potential and the can-do spirit in me, life wasn’t sweet but sour, and everything I had tried doing didn’t succeed. And being mad at things, I made changes. Once again, I looked at my life, reassessed things, and realized I was my devil because of the lifestyle I was leading. Immediately I decided not to engage in those habits anymore; things changed.
“You will never change what you tolerate. Everything you don’t hate, you allow. Anger brings change.” — Dr. Myles Munroe
As all negative emotions are great tools, if you channel them towards a good course, jealousy is. My covetousness of seeing people doing well in life than I, especially those below my age, couldn’t let me be but do something about my life because I hate to be jealous of people, whether it’s what they have or what they are doing with their lives. Therefore, not being a fan of this attitude, I had to turn my life around. I couldn’t stand it when I was jealous of someone. It’s propelled me to do whatever it takes to put my life in the direction it’s supposed to be. Because that feeling of knowing someone is doing better than you are in life and being jealous of their success isn’t great at all. And as I couldn’t stand it, I had to go to work to turn things around for my life, as well.
“We are made wise not by the recollection of our past, but by the responsibility for our future.” — George Bernard Shaw
As the above quote states, I’ve become wise and confident and powerful as an individual by the mere fact of taking responsibility for my life and future. It couldn’t be far from the truth. If you don’t take responsibility for the welfare of your life, someone does. They become in charge of you. They decide what you have to do, when, how. If things don’t sound right with you, you cannot challenge them because you aren’t in control. You aren’t able to see beyond reality. They trap you from being yourself. You can’t think for yourself and do things on your own. You are always playing the blame and the victim game and foisting responsibility for things that don’t go right in your life on someone. You don’t solve your life’s problems. All these things stopped the very day I said to myself, enough is enough; I’m the captain of my ship and master of my destiny and became in charge. I may not be where I wish to be in life, but I’m in the driver’s seat now. Not my dad, mum, family, or anyone.
How do you think I could even get the nerves to write this piece and advise you? How have I become a writer in the first place?
I took to cross the Saharan desert and the Mediterranean sea from Africa to Europe through the risk. If I’m still there, I don’t think I could discover my writing potential because the internet that helped me study and learn and still does, is hard to access. A risk I knew that I could have lost my life because of the dangerous nature of such a route to Europe — survive or die, no turning back, but I did it, anyway. If I hadn’t taken that risk, I wouldn’t be where I am now. I wouldn’t have access to the internet, which helped with my personal development and the discovery of myself and my writing potential. I’m not telling you about the risk I took from Italy, where I landed, to Spain, which could have gotten me deported if they had caught me because I didn’t have the documents to allow me on such a journey. I’m not also telling you about the risk I took to gain my legal resident documents. There are also serious life risks I’ve taken to be where I am in life now—all for another day. But the truth of the matter is that, without risks in life, we can’t get to where we would like to get, and the earlier we come to terms with it, the better.
“The biggest risk is not taking any risk… In a world that is changing really quickly, the only strategy that is guaranteed to fail is not taking risks.” — Mark Zuckerberg
This is my biggest take on all the tools I’ve used to transform my life. When I became angry with life because I wasn’t getting the results I wanted, felt jealous of others because they were doing better than me, and I couldn’t take it anymore; personal improvement helped me turn things around the most. Cultivating the habit of reading, attending educative seminars, listening to teachers like Jim Rohn’s, Dr. Myles Munroe, Les Brown's, etc., got all the dots connected for me. Through it, I discovered myself, my purpose on the planet — to educate and help people find themselves to live their purpose on earth. I have seen no one who’s successful in this world who didn’t do it with personal development. You don’t want to underestimate this powerful tool if you want a change in your life, too.
Acceptance of the reality
It’s related to accepting responsibility for your life but goes beyond it. It’s about the imperfect world we live in, full of injustice, inequality, hate, greed, unfairness, etc. That, you believe things should be the opposite. There should be fairness, equality, justice in everything and every area. But trust me, it’s never happening and won’t happen. The world as we have it is how it’s going to be. If there’s any change going to happen, it’s that which you do for yourself. Not what you think should happen with the justice system, people, the media, etc. If you don’t learn to accept things the way they are and constantly maneuver your way through, you wouldn’t be happy. And the moment I came to terms with this truth and accepted it, things changed for me.
By being teachable, understanding that life is a continuous journey of lessons, and having the willingness to learn has affected my life significantly. Killing my close-minded habit, being open, learning irrespective of who the information is coming from has helped me be in a better position in life. Until I gave up this habit, life was a struggle. Now it isn’t but a ride to enjoy. I love the new me. It can happen to you, too.
The ability to stand in the face of challenges and difficulties and keep doing what you are doing is a quality you can’t underestimate with success in life. Being able to stay on my grounds and be relentless has helped me get where I am now in my life. Initially, I used to be the person who didn’t like discomfort, and I will stop when I experience difficulties, opposition, and challenges with what I’m doing. I wasn’t the person you’ll describe as tenacious. I was fragile and wasn’t strong emotionally. This habit caused me to fail almost all my life with everything that I did. I had to sit down, re-evaluate my life, and the moment I discovered the lack of persistence on my part was the reason I wasn’t amounting to anything, and I changed it, everything clicked. I’ve achieved things I couldn’t achieve back then, and I still use this tool in everything I do. It’s one reason I’m who I am today and still becoming.
Becoming successful in life requires giving up certain habits—frequent partying, eating certain meals, instant gratifying stuff, etc. You have to give up on all of them. And doing so, self-control is what you need. When I stopped smoking full time, alcohol was what I used to replace it. I love my whisky and my red wine. I love women and sex. But when I realized to get to where I wanted in life, I would have to give up these things, I did, and the impact has been enormous. I have a sane mind. I’m highly creative. I don’t have health issues like I used to. I feel sound all the time, mentally and physically. And unlike yesterday's, where when I was anxious or depressed, and I will use some of these substances to see myself out, giving up on those habits has helped me to deal with emotional pains and internal struggle with the use of nothing. All made possible by self-control.
Prayer and fasting
This one is a big deal. We are spiritual beings having a human experience and not physical beings, having a spiritual experience. It’s therefore, calls for connecting yourself to the source all the time in everything you do. We are dealing with a lot beyond the physical that requires being fortified spiritually. And don’t get me twisted. I’m not coming from a religious point of view. My mum is a Christian, my dad, Muslim. I have grown to become none of them because I don’t believe in any of them. I hate religion, and I don’t want to have anything to do with it because we don’t need it to reach the heavens. I connect myself to the universal intelligence through prayer and fasting. Some prefer meditation, yoga, etc., and it’s ok with which one you love. But, if you wish to live an extraordinary life, connecting to the greater force of the universe is the only way. And since I’m not religious and don’t practice any of it ways, this is the tool I use. However, some religious bodies use it too. And if you can use it too, it will be beneficial to you. I’m not preaching to you the physical health benefits of fasting on our metabolism and digestion. Neither would I on the spiritual benefits, etc. You already know it and making it a part of you, you know where you’ll be heading with your life.
Life is a struggle and will always be. And with things being this, it doesn’t mean you can’t turn them around for your gain. You can. It’s possible. But, to do it means being willing to give up certain things that do not serve you. And it’s possible by using the tools I’ve shared with you. It will not be easy, though, when you decide. But with constant, continuous, and never-stopping commitment, tenacity, and grit, you’ll make it and live the life you want. Because, if someone like me, lazy, uninspired, and always doing the wrong things, has done it, you can, too. Just take the first step, follow it with a second one, and you’re on your way. Start now.